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Assertive men, bossy women? Uncovering double standards

Society imposes stereotypes that are harmful to leadership. Find out how and why.

By:
Shanti Banus
March 24, 2023
Assertive men, bossy women?

Crude truths about the battle women face

Are you tired of hearing that gender inequality in management positions is slowly changing? Well hold on, because we're going to talk about some hard truths about the uphill battle women face when it comes to climbing the corporate ladder.

Despite the supposed advances of recent years, women continue to be eclipsed by men in leadership positions. In Latin America, only 32% of management positions are held by women, and just 4% hold CEO positions. And in the United States it is not much better. Only 35% of executive positions are held by predominantly white women, and only 8.2% of Fortune 500 CEOs are women. And let's not even talk about the pay gap.

Women are not inherently less capable than men. The root of the problem lies in a patriarchal system that continues to dominate the world of work. For a long time, women were not allowed to work.

As a result, professionalism is not only seen through male eyes, but also continues to maintain and demand traits considered "masculine".

Men are expected to be assertive and dominant, while women are expected to be compliant and collaborative. We have been socialized with these outdated stereotypes since childhood, which makes it difficult for women to achieve leadership positions. And even if they do, they are often seen as exceptions rather than the norm.

These double standards are what psychology calls the double-bind bias: what is expected of leaders contradicts what is expected of women.

This bias is also reflected in the tendency to think of leadership in terms of "masculine" traits such as dominance, assertiveness and competitiveness. When it comes to women, these qualities are not naturally associated with them.

If a woman exhibits stereotypical feminine behaviors, such as empathy and attentiveness, she is unlikely to be considered for a leadership position because, unfortunately, these traits are not considered leadership qualities. On the other hand, if women are assertive and ambitious, they are likely to be labeled as "bossy" or "unfriendly," or even worse: "mean."

The same is true of leadership styles.

As mentioned above, leadership positions have historically been dominated by men. Therefore, it is not surprising that people expect "masculine" behavior from leaders. As a result, women often lack guidance in cultivating a leadership style that others accept as "good leadership" skills. Women in leadership positions may take a collaborative, participative and inclusive approach, but may be perceived as unreliable and lacking in authority.

But that's not all. Women who have children are often penalized for taking maternity leave or for having to combine work with family responsibilities.

It is no wonder that women are held to impossible standards that do not apply to men. Women are expected to be women are expected to be superwomen, to juggle work, family and social life with ease.No wonder they are exhausted and burned out?

As if that were not enough, Queen Bee Syndrome is another phenomenon that women should be aware of.

You may be wondering: what the heck is queen bee syndrome?

Let's analyze it. The Queen Bee syndrome or Queen Bee effect is a toxic phenomenon where women in leadership positions tear down other women to maintain their own power. Yes, it's real. And it can be analyzed as the byproduct of what happens when women are held to double standards.

Why does this happen, you ask?

Well, probably because women are forced to navigate a male-dominated work culture that values aggression and competition above all else. And let's not forget the fear of being replaced by a younger, more ambitious woman. Classic patriarchy: pitting women against each other for the sake of capitalism, ageism and objectification.

What can we do about it?

For starters, educate everyone about the unconscious biases and gender inequality that continue to dominate our work culture. Second, it is critical to highlight the massive benefits of having more women in leadership positions. More inclusive leadership creates more role models for younger women aspiring to become leaders. Beyond that, there are many other benefits. 

Studies in several countries suggest that companies with a higher representation of women at the highest levels have better organizational and financial performance, as well as better corporate governance. Similarly, women in senior Similarly, women in top positions improve productivity and collaboration, decrease sexual harassment claims, increase profits, and foster strategic problem solving throughout organizations..

Third, it is also important to encourage more mentoring and sponsorship programs to support the professional development of women and minorities. Oh,and how about holding leaders and managers accountable for promoting diversity, equity and inclusion? Crazy concept, right?

Effective and fair leadership transcends gender stereotypes.

It should be assessed through a global lens that encompasses a diverse range of traits and capabilities, rather than being limited to traditional gender roles. While qualities such as assertiveness and determination are important for leadership, they must be balanced with empathy and emotional intelligence.The reason? To create a holistic approach to leadership. 

True leadership is not about fitting into a predetermined mold, but about cultivating a unique set of skills and perspectives to inspire and guide others to success. It's time to create a culture of openness, diversity and inclusion where all employees feel valued and supported, regardless of gender or any other characteristic.

Edited by

Raquel Rojas

Assertive men, bossy women? Uncovering double standards
Shanti Banus
Community Manager & Writer
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